Letting Go of Past Hurts

Life is full of hurts. People let us down. People leave us. People hurt us in many ways. I have had my share of hurts, and once hurt, it can be a challenge to let it go. For some reason we hold on to this hurt, and let it affect us for long periods of time. But the hurt we hold on to does no good in our lives. In fact, it weighs us down. I know that in my former church I had some people who hurt me deeply with their words and actions. It took a long time to let it go, and until I let it go, it pulled me down.

One of the challenges of the hurts we hold on to is that often we have limited ability to resolve it. We can try to be reconciled to the person, but if they don’t want to be reconciled, then the conflict hangs over us. We are challenged by how much or how little we are able to fix the hurt. Depending on the nature of the relationship to the person who hurt you, you might not have much opportunity for resolution. So we carry around this unresolved issue.

What are we to do? I believe there are two things we can do: first, we can forget about it. Until we are given the chance to bring resolution to this conflict, or hurt, we need to forget about it. The only thing thinking about it will do is get you all upset again, and lead you to have angry feelings towards this other person.

Second, we need to learn how to forgive. Jesus, when He was on the cross, uttered these words: “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Jesus understood that the people who were hurting Him, killing Him, didn’t really understand the reality of what they were doing, because they didn’t understand who Jesus really was. Likewise, those who hurt us don’t have the concept of “relationship.” Jesus commanded us to “love one another as ourselves.” When we seek to hurt someone else, we are not being loving.

So we forgive for two reasons: one, because in the complexity of life, people truly don’t understand the fruitlessness of hurting others. So we forgive them like Jesus, because they do not know what they are doing. But even more importantly, we forgive them so that we can let go of this hurt in our own hearts and minds. Forgiveness allows us to let go of it, and give it to God. We can know that God will take care of it, instead of us thinking we have to.
Letting go is difficult in many ways, but important for our mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being.

What is Your Favorite Color?

Our blog group has picked this topic to write on this week. As I pondered the answer to this, I knew the simple answer is “blue.” Blue has been my favorite color for as long as I could remember. But why? Is it because boys are generally given blue, and girls are given pink when they are young? Perhaps. But if that were the only reason, I think it would have changed as I grew older. For example, my daughter liked pink for the longest time, but now her favorite color is purple. It takes more than an initial introduction to a color to make it your favorite.

It could be that the color of the sky is nice and peaceful, and has led me to like the color blue. Or perhaps blue jeans have been my favorite kind of pants for the longest time. Or the fact that I like the Dodgers (Go Dodger Blue!). Or that blue can be a soothing color. To tell you the truth, I can’t nail down exactly why blue is my favorite color.

Isn’t it true, that sometimes you can like something without having to have any deep, meaningful reasons? Isn’t life sometimes to be about just enjoying something because you connect with it for some reason? I believe life needs to have moments that are frivolous and shallow. I like the color blue, because for some reason it is a pleasing color to my mind and eye.

Yet, having said that, I do have to say that I am moved by many things with the color blue in it. Like I said before, the sky; I love a blue sky. Or the blue ocean; it is so amazing to see the clear blue water. Even a blue bird or a blue fish is tantalizing.

Isn’t it wonderful has God has given us so many colors in this world, and the choice for which one will be our favorite? God has made colors unique just as He has made you and I unique. So, it might be fun to share with someone, OR me, what your favorite color is, and why. And in doing so, celebrate your uniqueness.



Our blog group has picked this topic to write on this week. As I pondered the answer to this, I knew the simple answer is “blue.” Blue has been my favorite color for as long as I could remember. But why? Is it because boys are generally given blue, and girls are given pink when they are young? Perhaps. But if that were the only reason, I think it would have changed as I grew older. For example, my daughter liked pink for the longest time, but now her favorite color is purple. It takes more than an initial introduction to a color to make it your favorite.

It could be that the color of the sky is nice and peaceful, and has led me to like the color blue. Or perhaps blue jeans have been my favorite kind of pants for the longest time. Or the fact that I like the Dodgers (Go Dodger Blue!). Or that blue can be a soothing color. To tell you the truth, I can’t nail down exactly why blue is my favorite color.

Isn’t it true, that sometimes you can like something without having to have any deep, meaningful reasons? Isn’t life sometimes to be about just enjoying something because you connect with it for some reason? I believe life needs to have moments that are frivolous and shallow. I like the color blue, because for some reason it is a pleasing color to my mind and eye.

Yet, having said that, I do have to say that I am moved by many things with the color blue in it. Like I said before, the sky; I love a blue sky. Or the blue ocean; it is so amazing to see the clear blue water. Even a blue bird or a blue fish is tantalizing.

Isn’t it wonderful has God has given us so many colors in this world, and the choice for which one will be our favorite? God has made colors unique just as He has made you and I unique. So, it might be fun to share with someone, OR me, what your favorite color is, and why. And in doing so, celebrate your uniqueness.

The Glorious Freedom of the Children of God

In America we are said to live in the land of freedom. So we might ask, how are we free? We are supposedly free to worship any god we so choose; the government will not dictate to us who we will worship (if we even worship any god, since there are many who don’t believe there is a god). We also have the freedom to live where we want, as long as we can afford it. We have freedom of speech, meaning that we can give our opinions in a public forum without fear of being arrested or silenced (so long as we do it in an orderly manner). We have the freedom to seek out any career we want. I could go on, but I think you get the sense that we seem to have many freedoms.
Many think that freedom means that you can and should choose for yourself without anyone else telling you what you should do. And yet, is this really the best way? Choosing what we want without any other input? Think about children for a moment: if they were allowed to make choices, without the input of their parents or a responsible adult, then they would make choices that would hurt themselves or have a negative impact on their lives many times over. As children get older, there needs to be a balance between child and parent to help them learn how to make good decisions. There still is an aspect of control and guidance.
I mention this, because so often people talk about how Christians, children of God, are not free, because they are bound by the rules of the Bible; the rules that God imposes upon us. How can you be free if you have to abide by the 10 commandments? How can you be free if you are told that so many things in life shouldn’t be done because they are sinful? There is no freedom in all these rules and regulations.
The truth is, freedom is actually being able to make choices within a controlled environment. Any environment that doesn’t have boundaries and rules would be so chaotic that you could not live in freedom. It would be a free for all, and probably controlled by the strongest, the meanest, and the person with the greatest desire to control. You would not be free, but would ultimately become the slave of those who came to power.
God is a God of love; a God who has our best in mind. God is a God who seeks to lead us into loving relationships, and into a world where we serve others, and others serve us. God is a God who desires for people to be governed in a way that is not oppressive, but offers many freedoms. But God does establish rules and laws, and calls on the people to establish rules and laws for the good of all; for the sake of allowing freedom to exist. We are free as God’s children, because we can live in the way God has designed, and established for a world that allow us to love God, and love each other. What do you think?

It is said that money "is the root of all evil." Yet, without money we cannot live. So how is it that money is evil? Well, money isn't evil in and of itself, but in how it is used, and how it affects the way we live. I've heard many people say: "If I ever win the lottery, I'm going to give money to the church,” and to this person, and on and on they go. But more often than not, people end up spending it on themselves.
It has been shown that people who win the lottery often have their lives turned upside down, and sometimes even ruined. Evelyn Adams is one such story. "Winning the lottery isn't always what it's cracked up to be," says Evelyn Adams, who won the New Jersey lottery not just once, but twice (1985, 1986), to the tune of $5.4 million. She went on to say: "Everybody wanted my money. Everybody had their hand out..." She gave it away, gambled it away, and made many mistakes with her money. Today the money is all gone and Adams lives in a trailer. This is true for many lottery winners: one man had many lawsuits raised against him, and finally he had to file for bankruptcy. He now lives on food stamps. And on and on the stories go. Susan Bradley, a financial planner from Florida says: "In our culture, there is a widely held belief that money solves problems. People think if they had more money, their troubles would be over. When a family receives sudden money, they frequently learn that money can cause as many problems as it solves," she says. (from article by bankrate.com)
Why does money cause so many problems? Because people don't know how to manage their money, and people don't know how to use their money wisely. People in their family want a piece of it, but what they give is never enough, so it destroys relationships. OR, they spend, spend, spend on themselves, and get their focus off of God and onto this worldly living.
This is why Jesus talked so much about learning how to give of our money wisely, and in godly ways. When we are able to give of our money, then our money doesn't control us, we control it. There are only 3 things we can do with our money: spend it, give it away, or save it. We need to learn how and when to do all these things whether we have a little, or a lot!
So how about you, are you spending your money wisely, saving what you need to, and giving away generously? I encourage to think through how you utilize the money you have, so it isn't a root of evil for you. Blessings.

My Favorite Book

This week our blog group tackles the question "What is your favorite show or book?" As I was thinking about that, I thought about the many shows I like to watch. But I couldn't pinpoint any one as my "favorite." The same was true of all the fiction books I read. They have their entertaining value, but don't warrant for me the title "favorite." So I thought some more, and finally came up with "The Practice of the Presence of God," by Brother Lawrence.
I have actually done a whole blog series on this book back in the summer of 2007. So let me tell you why this is my favorite book. First, other than the Bible (which might technically be my favorite book), this book has probably impacted my life more than any other. Brother Lawrence was a simple cook and custodian at a monastery, but he had deep insights into the way God connects with us in every day life. He discovered that he could practice being aware of God's presence in his life in a way that is continuous. By doing this he was able to receive God's loving presence more regularly in his life.
I learned that the key is learning how to abandon our selfish desires, and give ourselves totally to God. Brother Lawrence says: "I sacrificed all of the pleasures in my life to God. But rather than punishing me, God gave me nothing but wholehearted satisfaction." By giving ourselves to God, we can learn how to live for God, and by living for God we gain satisfaction in our lives.
From this book I also learned that in giving ourselves to God, we need to learn how to be faithful, even in the dry periods. I know that there are ups and downs in our lives and in our faith. Through this book I discovered that in those times when we don't feel close to God, in those times when we don't feel like life is going well, we need to be even more determined to surrender ourselves to God and trust God.
Because of this book, I truly feel that I have constant conversation with God, and awareness of God's presence in my life. This transforms my daily living, because I don't have to have all the answers, I know that God is there to help me with the answers; I don't have to have all the strength, God will give me His strength; I don't have to have it all together, because God is right here with me to work out the good.
I would love to know what your favorite book is. Blessings.